literature

Bernardo Lovelock Interview

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General information:

1. Hi! What's your real name and nickname?
Bernardo Lovelock. My nickname would be Bernard if anyone called me that. (We're all kind of old-fashioned around here...)

2. Any reason you're named that?
Not really. My creator just thought it sounded "cool", apparently.

3. Who's your creator?
A guy named Chester Hardy with an English Lit major in college, apparently.

4. When were you was created? Is different from your date of birth? If so, where and when were you born?
September, 1980, I'm told. But since I have a backstory, I've existed since far earlier than that. I was born in the mountains of Scotland, approximately 1830.

5. Interesting... what would you do if you met your creator?
I would ask him "WHY?"

6. What is your gender?
I'm male.

7. What is your species?
I'm a toon bat. I'm also a vampire.

8. Interesting... what's your current age?
I've lost count by now, but well over 100.

9. Do you look your age?
Hardly. I became a vampire when I was 25.

10. What is your occupation?
I'm currently unemployed. I don't need a job.

11. To which social class do you belong?
Most people would call me wealthy, due to the great many riches I possess, but I don't actually make any income.

12. Would you consider yourself good or evil?
Most people would call me evil, but I beg to differ.

Physical characteristics:

1. Write a full physical description of yourself. You might want to consider factors such as: height, weight, race, hair and eye color, style of dress, and any tattoos, scars, or distinguishing marks. Are you healthy? Do you look healthy? Why or why not?
I'm about 5'6'', and I'm told that I'm rather underweight. I'm a toon bat. My fur is mostly black with white around my face and neck, and my eyes are bright green and pink. I tend to wear formal suits of bright colors. I've got sort of a widow's peak...
I don't look very healthy, but I feel very healthy, although not in the normal sense.

2. What do you consider to be your best physical characteristic? Why?
My wings and my fur. I tend to think that they look sexy.

3. How about your worst?
I've got bags under my eyes.

4. Do you have any allergies, diseases, or other physical weaknesses?
The usual things. Crosses, holy water, garlic, werewolf bites, stakes, sunlight... I'm vastly stronger than I look, though I don't like to use my strength.

5. Are you right- or left-handed?
Left. My parents tried to switch me, but I fought it and gradually switched back after I left home.

6. What does your voice sound like?
My enemies have called me a "Scottish weasel".

Interests:

1. What are your pet peeves?
The blemishing of beautiful things.

2. What are your likes?
The arts, mostly. Having fun.

3. What are your dislikes?
Hatred. Ugliness. Betrayal.

4. Uh huh. What's your favorite food?
Blood.

5. And your favorite drinks?
Blood.

6. OK! What's your favorite color?
Red- uh, I mean blue.

7. What, if anything, do you like to read?
Scary stories, love poetry (for some reason), and folklore.

8. Who's your favorite author?
Bram Stoker.
...and Edgar Allen Poe.

9. What is your idea of good entertainment (consider music, movies, art, etc.)?
All of the above.

10. What's your favorite kind of music?
Symphonies. Suites. Chamber music. That sort of thing.

11. What's your least favorite kind of music?
Love songs. They're so... untrue.

12. Do you have a favorite song?
I'm rather fond of the Große Fuge...

13. What is/are your favorite hobbies and pastimes?
Appreciating the arts in any way possible.

Personality:

1. How would you describe your personality? How would others?
I'm not a very brave person, that's for sure, but I love things of beauty and of a macabre nature. My friends would call me loyal. Others would just call me creepy.

2. Are you basically optimistic or pessimistic?
It kind of depends.

3. Are your an introvert or an extrovert? Why?
I'm generally an extrovert, but I have a lot of secrets.

4. Do you have any quirks, strange mannerisms, annoying habits, or other defining characteristics?
I'm told that I get sweaty and shaky when I'm nervous.

5. What words and/or phrases do you use very frequently?
I ask questions a lot when I get nervous.

6. Now what's your biggest fear?
Pain. Dying. What have you.

7. Do you have any phobias?
Quite a few, I'm sure, but I don't think I could name any.

8. Do you have any manias?
I'm a pyromaniac, definitely. There are probably others.

9. When was the time you were most frightened?
Let's see... how many times has that happened, now...?

10. What's your worst nightmare?
Dying. Or perhaps feeling the pain of heartbreak and my own continued existence.
...
...I shouldn't have said that...

11. Who's your hero?
Sweet, sweet darkness.

12. Ok, who is your worst enemy?
Sunlight. The burning, burning sun.

13. What would you do if your hero and your worst enemy hung out?
It would be a recitation of "The Walrus and the Carpenter".

14. Do you tend to argue with people, or avoid conflict?
I avoid conflict, for sure.

15. Do you tend to take on leadership roles in social situations?
Usually. Unless I'm scared of it.

16. Do you like interacting with large groups of people? Why or why not?
Only if they're not trying to kill me- that is, my friends. I like parties.

17. In general, how do you treat others (politely, rudely, by keeping them at a distance, etc.)? Does your treatment of them change depending on how well you know them, and if so, how?
I'm friendly to people who don't try to kill me. Even so, I prefer to keep my distance so I don't get hurt.

18. When you're alone, do you act the same as when you're with someone?
I don't, but I'd rather not talk about it.

19. Do you care what others think of you?
Very much so.

20. What is your greatest strength as a person?
I care very much about my friends, and the preservation, creation, and promotion of beauty.

21. What is your greatest weakness?
I'm a very nervous person.

22. Do you have a soft spot? If so, is it obvious? Why or why not?
I can't discuss that. But everyone knows that I have one- they just don't ask me.

23. Do you try to hide it? How?
I do, and I don't like to talk about it.

24. Are you generally organized or messy?
Messy, I think. I like a good sprawl. I know where everything is, though...

25. How do you deal with stress?
Badly.

26. Would you consider yourself to be a daredevil or cautious?
I'm usually cautious, but I always try to throw caution to the wind. I can usually do that when I'm at home.

27. Are you spontaneous or do you always need to have a plan?
I usually just wing it.

28. When are you most at ease?
When I'm relaxing in my castle before going to bed.

29. When are you most ill at ease?
When somebody's chasing me. Or asking me questions I don't want to answer.

30. Do you have any talents? What are they?
I've found that I'm very good at interior and exterior decorating.

31. Name three things you consider yourself to be very good at, and three things you consider yourself to be very bad at.
Good:
Living
Seeing
and Enduring.
Bad:
Loving
Daring
and Fear-facing.

32. What is your darkest secret?
Wouldn't YOU like to know?

33. Does anyone know your secret? How do they know?
At least one person does. I won't tell you how.

34. What do you have in your pockets usually?
Keys to the castle.

35. Do you like yourself?
Not really.

Backstory:

1. Who are/were your parents, if any?
My father was named Douglas Lovelock. My mother was Alejandra Castillo. She was Spanish. They're both dead.

2. Do you have any siblings? What are/were they like?
I had several brothers. They beat me because I was small.
...
...They're all dead now.

3. How would you describe your childhood in general?
Miserable. With brief moments of shining happiness.

4. What is your earliest memory?
Falling down a well.

5. What was your hometown like?
It was pretty isolated and practically part of the wilderness. Very rocky. There were a lot of caves and woods and things.

6. How much schooling have you had?
I was schooled by my parents, which means I didn't go through any grades or anything like that. Everything else came from books. I was an apprentice for a tailor for some years.

7. Where did you learn most of your skills and other abilities?
From working on our farm and hunting for food. And from that tailor. I'm self-taught when it comes to everything else.

8. While growing up, did you have any role models?
My mother, mostly. She was real nice.

9. While growing up, how did you get along with the other members of your family?
Like I mentioned before- with my brothers? Terribly. My father loved me, but was strict. My mother was the best.

10. As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?
A gardener, I think. I liked flowers. My father told me that was strange.

11. As a child, what were your favorite activities?
Exploring caves and forests.

12. As a child, what kinds of personality traits did you display?
I was very quiet and timid, but a hard worker.

13. As a child, were you popular? Who were your friends, and what were they like?
I had no friends.

14. What was the most important event in your childhood, and how did it effect you? Does it still effect you?
That would probably be the day when my father started teaching me about work and supporting yourself. I still make sure to do all that.

15. Where do you live now, and with whom? Describe the place and the person/people.
In my castle, somewhere in the mountains of Germany. I won't tell you where, since they'd come after me if they knew. They already know I'm in Germany, but that's all they're going to know.
I live with a group of friends who see me as their leader. They tend to be vampires as well, although some of them are goblins of various sorts and some of them are ghosts. I have one ogre, who tends my garden.

16. Who are your friends? Do you have a best friend? Describe these people.
The people and things I live with. Actually, there's this distant cousin of mine who visits from time to time... he's not dead or anything, but we tend to think alike.
In general? Well, they're creepy and they're kooky...

Relationships:

17. When and with whom was your first kiss?
Gertrude from down the road. She was an early blossom...

18. Are you a virgin? If not, when and with whom did you lose your virginity?
I am most certainly not a virgin. It was with Gertrude.

19. Have you ever been in love? If so, describe what happened.
I'd rather not.

20. Do you believe in the existence of soul mates and/or true love?
I used to.

21. Confession time! Who's your crush/lover?
Who told yo-- uh, I mean, I'm not at liberty to say.

22. Have you two kissed yet?
I've kissed the necks of thousands.

23. Do you have a spouse or significant other? If so, describe this person.
No.

24. What do you look for in a potential lover?
Loyalty. If I were looking for one.

25. How close are you to your family?
They're dead.

26. Have you ever started your own family? If so, describe them. If not, do you want to? Why or why not?
I don't want to. I used to, but not anymore.

27. What are your views on sex?
...I want more of it.
No, no, I didn't say that! I didn't say that!

Outlook on Life:

1. Do you have any spiritual, religious, or philosophical beliefs?
I believe in God, but being a vampire, He's dangerous to me.
Most would call me a "romantic", but I don't like that term.

2. What do you consider the most important event of your life so far?
The day I became a vampire.

3. Who has had the most influence on you?
I'm not sure if a person has had influence on me, but books certainly were- and have been- my biggest inspiration.

4. What are your highest priorities?
Keeping my friends happy and my castle beautiful.

5. What motivates you?
Joy and beauty.

6. What do you consider your greatest achievement?
My discovery of this beautiful castle of mine.

7. What is your greatest regret?
Having ever listened to my heart in the midst of infatuation.
...
...Did I just say that?

8. If you could have one wish granted, what would it be, and why?
To undo my worst mistakes, because they still haunt me.

9. What is the most evil thing you have ever done?
I sucked a flower girl dry once. I was very thirsty that night.

10. Do you have a criminal record of any kind?
The supernatural kind. And a larger one than you could imagine.

11. What is the most embarrassing thing ever to happen to you?
I once crashed into a church bell tower while flying. I wasn't looking where I was going.

12. If you could change one thing from your past, what would it be, and why?
Getting into any relationships with women.

13. Is there anything you would like to change about yourself?
I'd like to be braver and more confident.

14. What is your best memory?
Discovering that I had artistic vision.

15. What is your worst memory?
...I'd rather not talk about it.

16. Are you able to kill? Under what circumstances do you find killing to be acceptable or unacceptable?
Are you kidding? I'm a vampire, for Pete's sake.
...Actually, I prefer not to kill my victims, if I can help it. I usually only drink what I need to live.

17. In your opinion, what is the most evil thing any human being could do?
Break someone's heart and let them down.

18. What do you believe makes a successful life?
Being surrounded by things that give you joy.

19. How honest are you about your thoughts and feelings (i.e. do you hide your true self from others and in what way)?
I'd rather not say.

20. Do you have any biases or prejudices?
I really don't like Italian food.

22. Is there anything you absolutely refuse to do under any circumstances? Why do you refuse to do it?
Eat garlic.

23. Who or what, if anything, would you die for (or otherwise go to extremes for)?
My friends, perhaps, if they were in imminent danger.

24. What is your most treasured possession?
I have this painting of Lilith that I like very much... I have others, but they're secret.

25. Do you smoke, drink, or use drugs? If so, why? Do you want to quit?
I need to drink blood to stay alive. Does that sound like I want to quit?

26. How do you spend a typical Saturday night?
Drinking the blood of people on the street.

27. What makes you laugh?
A good macabre joke.

28. What, if anything, shocks or offends you?
Destruction of beauty.

29. What's your favorite quote?
"From ghoulies and ghosties
And long-legged beasties
And things that go bump in the night,
Good Lord, deliver us!"

30. Now, what do you want to be when you "grow up"?
An architect, I think. And a painter, too... create the most beautiful castles and mansions... I've been putting that off...

31. What's your lifelong dream?
To open people's eyes to the beauty that surrounds them, in the strangest and perhaps darkest of places.

32. What would you do if your lifelong dream came true?
I would ask for credit. I should hope that it would give me influence...

33. Ok, where's your favorite place to relax?
In front of the roaring fireplace, in my big comfy velvet chair, with perhaps a book of poetry or short stories...

34. Who is the most important person in your life, and why?
My mother, I suppose. I'm not sure.

35. Who is the person you respect the most, and why?
Well, there's this guy called Ludwig van Beethoven...

36. Who would you turn to if you were in desperate need of help?
My cousin, I guess.

37. Do you trust anyone to protect you? Who, and why?
My friends, definitely. They're sympathetic for me.

38. If you died or went missing, who would miss you?
My friends.

39. Who is the person you despise the most, and why?
There's this priest that's been after me for some time now...

40. What goal do you want to accomplish the most in your lifetime?
To conquer hate and ugliness.

41. Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
Sitting right here, I suppose.

42. If you could choose, how would you want to die?
With a really stirring monologue, right before they plunge a stake through my heart.

43. What three words best describe your personality?
Freaky toon vampire.

44. What three words would others probably use to describe you?
Freaky toon vampire.

45. Last question! What do you spend most of your time doing?
Beating my brains out with escapism.
So I got tagged by :iconpsychoangel51402: to do a mock interview with an original character of mine. I didn't have anything prepared for the few original characters that I've dared to put up here, but I was up to the challenge to do one for the complex and enigmatic personality of Bernardo Lovelock: [link]
Of course, being the ambitious sort, I decided to combine the various questionarres and bio formats I had collected in recent years into one big, detailed interview.

If any of the questions or answers are confusing to you, it's probably because I'm writing in terms of the Who Framed Roger Rabbit? universe.

Hopefully this'll look good for the judges.

And if anyone's interested in what the Große Fuge is...
[link]

~Fatal hilarity
© 2010 - 2024 tymime
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PsychoAngel51402's avatar
This is FASCINATING! Well worth the wait! Now I'm even more anxious to read his whole story! I hope you hang on to this character until you make the bigtime, then make his story into a MOVIE!!! Seriously, you've got a complete Bernardo fangirl on your hands now, my friend!